Men and Women as Partners in Ministry

In Christian ministry, how do men and women partner in ministry, as co-pastors or part of a team, without falling into several traps.

By traps, I mean things like:

(a) Treating women as honorary men;
(b) Making token appointments of women to positions of junior leadership;
(c) Assuming that men need a warning sign, “May break into patriarchy at any moment,”
(d) Thinking that some gifts come in pink or blue; and
(e) Failing to recognize that gifts are exercised not despite gender but precisely through it, that is, as men and women who serve the churches.
(f) Putting women on a different pay scale.

What is needed, instead, is a balanced and inclusive strategy that values the unique contributions and gifts of both sexes. Here are some key principles to avoid falling into those traps.

Biblical Equality and Christian Identity. Recognize that both men and women are created in the image of God and have a shared identity in Christ. Base ministry partnerships on this foundation of human equality and mutual identity, and then seek to put it into practice. Remember, even churches that are egalitarian are still unlikely to have a female senior pastor. So we need to ask if we really believe in equality and identity.

Shared Leadership. Emphasize shared leadership models where decision-making and authority are distributed between men and women as appropriate to your church’s form of governance. Encourage collaboration, mutual respect, and shared responsibility in ministry roles. Don’t pigeonhole people into certain roles because of their gender.

Gift-based Ministry. Focus on identifying, cultivating, and utilizing the spiritual gifts of people regardless of gender. Allow men and women to serve in areas where they are gifted and called. Yes, it is good to have events and places for men-only and women-only, but let’s remember that it takes both genders to lead, serve, and equip a church.

Gender Pay and Support. Make sure men and women are equally supported at the level of remuneration, tuition support if in seminary, and any financial compensation. Too many women find themselves over-worked, underpaid, and not getting the same support as the male colleagues. In fact, not these disturbing statistics from Jen Wilkin:

A survey of women’s ministry leaders released in October from Lifeway Research revealed that 83 percent of them were unpaid, and 86 percent lacked formal theological training of any kind. For churches with more than 500 in attendance, only 29 percent of women’s ministry leaders were in paid, full-time positions and another 24 percent were paid part-time. Almost half (46%) received no pay.

Embrace the Complexity. Every church leadership team needs to learn through trial and error how to negotiate the complexities of mixed leadership where women may find men abrupt and men find it hard to work with female verbal processors. There are differences between men and women just as there are differences between men and between women. People are unique and we have to grapple with that in healthy ways and learn to build each other up even with our quirks.

Mentoring and Discipleship. Encourage intentional mentoring relationships between men and women where there is growth, accountability, support, and skills development. This helps to cultivate a sense of growing and journeying together.

Contextualized Approach. Recognize that different cultural contexts may influence the expression of gender roles. Strive to understand resident cultural nuances while maintaining a commitment to biblical principles of equality and justice. There’s a difference between how you negotiate gender differences in Indonesia and Indianana and you’ve got to sort out what are the cultural norms you express faith in and what cultural norms need to be sanctified by the gospel. That’s a hard one!

Hopefully, by embracing these principles, men and women can work together as partners in Christian ministry, promoting a healthy and balanced approach that avoids both patriarchal dominance, an imaginary gender-blind world, and unhelpful derision of masculinity.